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This past week has been profoundly heart-wrenching for the Atlanta Jewish community, as we mourn the tragic death of Ari Manuel “Manny” Pargman.

While I did not have the privilege of knowing Manny personally, I am incredibly moved by the heartfelt stories and tributes shared by members of our Sinai family. His death is a devastating reminder that members of our community are silently struggling with mental illness. 

This week in our Torah, we read Parshat Vayishlach, in which Jacob wrestles with an angel.

Genesis 32:25 tells us: “Jacob was left alone, and a man wrestled with him until the break of dawn.”

This verse evokes a powerful image: a young Jacob, alone in the dark, wrestling through the night. Much has been written about who Jacob was wrestling, and some scholars suggest that he was battling with the darkness within himself.

Rabbi Paul Cohen teaches us that just as Jacob fought his struggle alone, many of us silently grapple with our own inner turmoil. The darkness of night in our parashah can symbolize the loneliness and societal judgment that accompany struggles with mental health.

Yet Jacob’s story also reminds us that even in darkness, there is room for growth. In Vayishlach, Jacob's name is changed to “Israel”—meaning “one who struggles” or “one who wrestles.” This transformation signifies that our struggles, our battles with inner demons, are what can ultimately reveal our strength and resilience.

The legacies of both Jacob and Manny show us the importance of building communities where we are not ashamed of our challenges, but rather feel safe and supported in sharing them. We must create spaces where compassion, patience, and understanding prevail, helping one another through the darkness until we reach the other side.

Mental health is not only the responsibility of the individual—it is the responsibility of our entire community. We must foster environments in our synagogues, schools, homes, and relationships where talking openly about our struggles is the norm. We truly have the power to save lives.  While it is a message we all know, at times we need a reminder: we never know what someone is facing inside, but it is up to us to help those we know and love,  feel safe enough to share their truth.

To those who are grieving Manny’s loss in an especially intimate way—please know that we are with you in your pain. Our clergy team is here for you, as are all of us in this community. If you are struggling with your own mental health, particularly during these shorter, darker days, know that we are here for you as well. This week,  we renew our commitment to eliminating the stigma surrounding mental health. Our doors and hearts are always open.  I hope that this Shabbat brings peace to all who are suffering and mourning. May we all find comfort in the knowledge that we are not alone in our struggles, and that together, we can heal. Shabbat Shalom.